Get Your Goat or, Dancing With Mr. G.

Is 2009 going to be the year of the Goat?

Let’s hope so.

And no, I’m not talking about the metaphorical goat, like the bonus babies at AIG or any of the other recently disgraced masters of the now incredibly shrunken universe.

I’m talking about the real deal; goat. The type you eat. Everyone knows Goat Cheese (our beloved chevre) is legit; but only recently has Goat Meat started to gain some traction in our beef-centric country. In today’s New York Times, Henry Alford gets all Zamfir about this up-and-coming comestible: How I Learned to Love Goat Meat:

Indeed, goats have long held a lowly reputation. Scavengers, they are falsely accused of eating tin cans. Their unappetizing visage is simultaneously dopey and satanic, like a Disney character with a terrible secret. Their chin hair is sometimes prodigious enough to carpet Montana. Chaucer said they “stinken.”

My conversion moment came this February when I went to the West Village restaurant Cabrito and had the goat tacos. This hip taquería-style restaurant — which is named after the baby goat that is pit-barbecued in Texas and Mexico — marinates its meat for 24 hours before wet-roasting it over pineapple, chilies, onion and garlic. The resultant delicious pulled meat is tender throughout and slightly crisp and caramelized around the edges. Think lamb, but with a tang of earthy darkness. Think lamb, but with a rustle in the bushes. Think … jungle lamb. Suddenly I was go go goat. I wanted to order goat in as many restaurants as possible. Shortly into this process, a friend asked me, “Is it gay meat?” Confused, I said, “There’s nothing gay about it at all.” She explained, “No, I said is it gamey?”

This goat = good: 

This goat, not so much:

I myself am new to the goat game, but I’m already a fan, and hope the trend takes hold. The goats have had their way with us, I reckon it’s time we returned the favor. And after that, we can eat some goat meat.

Share

You Using the Whole Fist, Wall Street?

I can’t get that hot, asphalt taste out of my mouth. We’re all out of money, it seems, but there is plenty of tar to go around. I  was only half-joking when I proposed that perhaps it was time to revisit the old-fashioned (and quite brutal, even savage) practice of tarring and feathering disgraced public servants, here and here. Less than two months later, our capacity for outrage has scarcely been quelled; indeed, we all better begin practicing yoga in order to prepare our nervous systems for the flood of feelings that will churn up as more of this mendacity is revealed.

I’ve considered myself relatively (remotely?) in the loop, just in terms of keeping abreast of the seemingly daily revelations about how outrageous and, let’s stop mincing words and tiptoing around the truth, criminal the so-called masters of the universe have acted in bringing down our entire economy. Most people know that these scumbags shit money because they eat it all day, but very few of us had any idea that we all had skin in this poker game they were playing with the national piggy bank. I’ve read virtually everything I can to try to get a handle on the situation (above and beyond the whys and wherefores, but just the simple how the hell did we get here and where the hell do we go from here?), and even reading a little is enough to make one sick. The aftershock of this meltdown is a psychic jet-lag that won’t pass anytime soon. Therefore, it is going to be imperative for us to seek out reliable sources of information and arm ourselves with the truth, because when the sytem shits itself we all have skidmarks in our shorts. Where we are right now is the proverbial car wreck you can’t help but look at. Only this car wreck involves each and every one of our cars, except that none of us were driving them at the time. Hence the proliferating public outrage.


 
As usual, Frank Rich is able to articulate, in one short column, the context of this escalating debacle in terms of where we find ourselves, right now. He rightly grasps the insidious bigger picture, but also correctly questions whether Obama is properly equipped to meet this challenge before it devours his administration. In short, everyone knows the game is rigged, but it’s time to wonder aloud how Change (with a capital C) can come about if everyone involved is playing on the same squad?

To get ahead of the anger, Obama must do what he has repeatedly promised but not always done: make everything about his economic policies transparent and hold every player accountable. His administration must start actually answering the questions that officials like Geithner and Summers routinely duck.

Inquiring Americans have the right to know why it took six months for us to learn (some of) what A.I.G. did with our money. We need to understand why some of that money was used to bail out foreign banks. And why Goldman, which declared that its potential losses with A.I.G. were “immaterial,” nonetheless got the largest-known A.I.G. handout of taxpayers’ cash ($12.9 billion) while also receiving a TARP bailout. We need to be told why retention bonuses went to some 50 bankers who not only were in the toxic A.I.G. unit but who left despite the “retention” jackpots. We must be told why taxpayers have so little control of the bailed-out financial institutions that we now own some or most of. And where are the M.R.I.’s from those “stress tests” the Treasury Department is giving those banks?

Is this going to happen? Don’t bet on it. But why? Such a simple, and fair question. Unfortunately, as Rich indicates, the answer is also simple, and it’s ugly:

Another compelling question connects all of the above: why has there been so little transparency and so much evasiveness so far? The answer, I fear, is that too many of the administration’s officials are too marinated in the insiders’ culture to police it, reform it or own up to their own past complicity with it.

Matt Taibbi does some incredibly heavy lifting here, and this is award-winning journalism (I won’t hold my breath, since he is not counted amongst the connected and celebrated, and ever-supine, fraternity of the MSM):

People are pissed off about this financial crisis, and about this bailout, but they’re not pissed off enough. The reality is that the worldwide economic meltdown and the bailout that followed were together a kind of revolution, a coup d’état. They cemented and formalized a political trend that has been snowballing for decades: the gradual takeover of the government by a small class of connected insiders, who used money to control elections, buy influence and systematically weaken financial regulations.

The crisis was the coup de grâce: Given virtually free rein over the economy, these same insiders first wrecked the financial world, then cunningly granted themselves nearly unlimited emergency powers to clean up their own mess. And so the gambling-addict leaders of companies like AIG end up not penniless and in jail, but with an Alien-style death grip on the Treasury and the Federal Reserve — “our partners in the government,” as Liddy put it with a shockingly casual matter-of-factness after the most recent bailout.

The mistake most people make in looking at the financial crisis is thinking of it in terms of money, a habit that might lead you to look at the unfolding mess as a huge bonus-killing downer for the Wall Street class. But if you look at it in purely Machiavellian terms, what you see is a colossal power grab that threatens to turn the federal government into a kind of giant Enron — a huge, impenetrable black box filled with self-dealing insiders whose scheme is the securing of individual profits at the expense of an ocean of unwitting involuntary shareholders, previously known as taxpayers.

The most galling thing about this financial crisis is that so many Wall Street types think they actually deserve not only their huge bonuses and lavish lifestyles but the awesome political power their own mistakes have left them in possession of. When challenged, they talk about how hard they work, the 90-hour weeks, the stress, the failed marriages, the hemorrhoids and gallstones they all get before they hit 40.

“But wait a minute,” you say to them. “No one ever asked you to stay up all night eight days a week trying to get filthy rich shorting what’s left of the American auto industry or selling $600 billion in toxic, irredeemable mortgages to ex-strippers on work release and Taco Bell clerks. Actually, come to think of it, why are we even giving taxpayer money to you people? Why are we not throwing your ass in jail instead?”

But before you even finish saying that, they’re rolling their eyes, because You Don’t Get It. These people were never about anything except turning money into money, in order to get more money; valueswise they’re on par with crack addicts, or obsessive sexual deviants who burgle homes to steal panties. Yet these are the people in whose hands our entire political future now rests.

Obviously, Obama inherited this shit storm. People would be more inclined to cut him slack if his administration did not happen to include some of the slimiest engineers of this national implosion. Throwing Chris Dodd to the wolves while going to the mat for Geithner is the first thing Obama has done that strikes me as blatantly political and self-serving. It borders on the outrageous and it considerably weakens his integrity (as an agent of change, and as a leader). And frankly, the bloated dog and pony shows in Congress aren’t doing much for me. It’s good TV for the C-SPAN cycle, but these clowns are a day late and a few billion dollars short. As usual, these out-of-touch enablers are only capable of (feigning) outrage when the public prompts them. While the Wall Street clusterfuck signifies the official comeuppance of Republican financial ideology, let there be no mistake that there are plenty of Democrats whose porcine paws are filthy with the muck they’ve been lazily wallowing in.

The only ostensible silver lining in this catastrophe is that the pitchfork wielding populace might oblige some overdue accountability. What we really need is a reckoning, but a simple Q&A session will signify sufficient progress at this juncture. It’s time to start getting some very basic questions answered, and it’s not too late to take back money that was handed out to unworthy recipients (on the individual level as well as entire companies). People are right to point out that the AIG bonuses are a tempest in a tea (party) pot in terms of the overall GDP, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t demand return on our investment; it’s our money now. Start with this minor mess, and work backward. That, and only that, will set the necessary precedent for how we untangle ourselves from this capitalist-on-crack quicksand going forward. Naive as it may sound, truth needs to trump politics, at long last. Anyone, no matter what side of the political fence they get Wall Street kickbacks from, needs to come clean. (Okay, that fantasy goes beyond naive and borders on comical.) We know the people lined up at the trough are disinclined to question their own conduct, so it’s time to slap the teet out of their mouths and demand some answers. Heads need to roll, at least figuratively. That, at least, is a start. 

Share

This Just In: Richard Cohen is still a Clown

I’ve found ample reason to be disgusted with Richard Cohen’s clownish and self-aggrandizing claptrap many times in the past, including back in January, when I made the following observation:

When it suits him, when it’s convenient, Cohen could perhaps be described as left-leaning. But between his stances (on war, on Israel, apparently on torture) he is as effective a mouthpiece as any neo-con crackpot. Indeed, he is even more effective (and harmful) because he is ostensibly writing, as a “liberal”, in an ostensibly “liberal” paper (Washington Post). Of course, this canard is easy to deconstruct, but in the shorthand illogic of our times, he is, by default, a liberal by virtue of even being a member of the MSM.

And that is where we find ourselves today, with Cohen’s risible (yet oh so predictable) take on the Jon Stewart/Jim Cramer dust-up. I was shocked, shocked to discover that Cohen (one of the few MSM columnists to even address the issue, it should be noted) is making sure he devotes space to defending not only the Wall Street scumbags, but, of course, his comrades (and by extension, himself) in the MSM. How on earth could they have been expected to see this coming?

Indeed, Cohen’s lame and unbelievably solipsistic rationalization is that he too was hoodwinked by AIG. Instead of offering up a tardy mea culpa, Cohen doubles down under the pretense that, hey, if he was taken in by his own greed and myopia, how could he be accused of being…greedy and myopic? Not to mention derelict in his ostensible duties as a journalist. What he doesn’t seem to get is that in his self-serving justification, he is proving that it’s impossible for a writer in bed with the very system he is supposed to police to…police it. Cohen, of course, is the ultimate inside-the-beltway insider, and every time he attempts to armor his delicate integrity, he betrays how invested he is in the status quo. Not only won’t he, like so many of his brethren, dare rock the boat, he goes out of his way to castigate others (Stewart, Colbert) for doing so. This goes beyond cowardice and approaches the putrid state of aiding and abetting the powerful. “The big shots also believed,” he writes, as if that absolves them from criminal culpability. The big shots also walked away very rich, Richard. And that does not even take into account the work he is doing to diminish an egregiously overdue examination of the failed policy and backward ideology that created (indeed, guaranteed) the mess we’re in.

That he continues to find it necessary (not to mention possible) to carry water for Bush/Cheney’s worst misdeeds is bad; that he is actually doing it to protect his own miscalculations and timidity is much, much worse. It proves, yet again, that the only thing that truly outrages media types is when media types are taken to task. Then, and only then, is it time to circle the wagons, and dismiss as mere “entertainers” or “bloggers” the people who are pointing out their opportunism and hypocrisy. When you read the insufferable rants from folks like Krauthammer and Kristol, you know that in the heart of their blackened hearts, they know how full of shit they are; what is so distressing about Cohen is that his weakness and dishonesty is at once so transparent and so, apparently, genuine. As we saw more than enough of the last eight years, there is seldom something so dangerous as a person who consistently gets it wrong while being certain he is always right.

Share